Summertime Sadness: Seasonal Depression in the Summer, Being Human, and Other Stuff That Happens
“Summer, summer, summer. I loved and hated
summers. Summers had a logic all their own, and they always brought something
out in me. Summer was supposed to be about freedom and youth and no school and
possibilities and adventure and exploration. Summer was a book of hope. That’s
why I loved and hated summers. Because they made me want to believe.”
—Benjamin Alire Sáenz
*Tina Fey in Mean Girls voice* How many of you have ever felt personally victimized by seasonal depression in the summer?
The general consensus and sweeping generalization is that the vast majority of people suffer from seasonal depression—also known by its official term, seasonal affective disorder (SAD)—in the winter months, when there is less sunlight and the days are shorter, and this typically causes people to fall into what we commonly call the “winter blues.” That is very much true for a lot of people. Winter blues is an actual psychological condition, and there has been a wide variety of research into the true affects and causes. But there is actually shockingly little information and research available on those who experience seasonal affective disorder in reverse—that is, they get the summer blues instead of the winter blues. Also, can we just quickly acknowledge the sheer irony in the fact that seasonal affective disorder abbreviates to SAD? Like, yes bitch, I’m SAD in the summer. It’s a thing.
According to Psychology Today, “For a small group of people, the dark days of winter don’t elicit depression, but renewed vigor and improved mood.” They say that experiencing seasonal affective disorder in reverse—since SAD is literally defined as experiencing the blues in the winter and no other seasons—affects about one-tenth of people who say they experience seasonal depression. “While winter SAD is linked to a lack of sunlight, it is thought that summer SAD is due to the reverse—possibly too much sunlight, which also lead to modulations in melatonin production. Another theory is that people might stay up later in the summer, throwing their sensitive circadian rhythms for a loop. Interestingly, summer SAD and winter SAD seem to be prevalent in areas that are particularly prone to warmer summers.” In other words, not everyone rejoices when the temperature goes up. It’s great that popular psychology has explored the winter blues at great length, but it seems very exclusionary to have very little discourse on experiencing seasonal depression in the summer. “Georgetown University psychiatrist and professor Norman Rosenthal, who first described and coined the term Seasonal Affective Disorder, notes that the drop in temperature can be calming for those people, who might otherwise find the summer heat oppressive and agitating.” I quite literally feel oppressed by the heat, just like how everyone in that gym felt personally victimized by Regina George. I’m sorry if I’m not all sunshine and roses in the summer like everyone else—I’m trying my very best, but Lana was right: “Summertime Sadness” is a bitch. Seasonal depression in the summer can be summarized by a single scene in the film Reality Bites:
The very little research that has been done on SAD in the summer, however, says that it is more common among those who experience changes in mood when the temperature goes up. But there are very key differences between the winter blues and the summer blues, if we can even call it that. “Notable differences between summer and winter SAD are that summer SAD individuals may typically feel manic, whereas those with winter SAD lack energy.” I feel like everyone might lack a bit of energy in the winter, just because it is cold and gray and the days are short and I think that does start to get to everyone after awhile. But I’d much prefer the feeling I get in the winter, where I lack a bit of energy and use it as an excuse to be unproductive and watch The Mary Tyler Moore Show in bed all day. For someone like me, who has to remind themselves that it’s okay and necessary to take breaks and not constantly feel productive, days like those in the winter are often a welcome distraction. But when the summer rolls around, where the days are longer and there’s more sunlight (and heat), it’s almost like I feel contractually obliged by the season to be productive. I may have a to-do list of things that I would normally have no problem getting done over a series of days, but I find when I have both more time off and more hours in the day in the summer, it’s like I rush myself to get everything done as fast as humanly possible, just because I can. And I don’t even feel accomplished afterward! I feel drained, tired, sweaty, and hot, just like I did when I started the day. I do tend to feel manic in the summer, where I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with all this extra energy. And even when I try to force myself to rest, it doesn’t work. It’s chaotic and exhausting, and only gets worse as I get older.
I think it has something to do with the fact that I’m still getting accustomed to becoming an adult while still being a student. When I was in elementary school and high school, I used to heavily rely on my time off in the summer, because I knew I would be constantly working and going during the school year. Looking back, I realize now that a lot of that pressure I felt during the school year was created by me and my desire for perfection—if I could ruthlessly devote myself to my schoolwork during the school year, I would earn my time off in the summer. That’s how it’s always been for me. I have to earn my time off, or else I won’t be able to relax. But it doesn’t really work like that in the adult world, which is why I always have to remind myself that breaks are important and necessary, otherwise I’ll become a machine that doesn’t stop and won’t even realize that I’ve more than earned a break or two. Which is why, in the summer, I tend to feel all of these things intensely and all at once, because I’m not in school and don’t always have anything else to do that I feel passionately about every single day.
I tend to long for fulfillment in the summer, and I know I’m not alone on that. My friend Kayla (who is a graphic designer you can follow on Instagram @kaysthetics) told me she totally understands and resonates with the feelings experienced by those with seasonal depression in the summer. “The loneliness and existential dread that hits is absolutely rough and I long for fulfillment during the toughest of nights,” she said. “Routine is also a horrifying factor during the summer.” When you’re still trying to get used to this whole adulthood thing, it’s surprisingly hard to define yourself outside of what you knew to be true of yourself in the past. Not to say everything that was true about you when you were a child is gone, but it’s difficult to make that transition when you’ve always been someone who has kept your head down, gotten your work done, and been whoever anyone else wanted you to be. So when summer no longer merely means time off from school and any and all freedom that implies, it’s also difficult to feel happy and upbeat when you’re not doing something that you feel passionately about every day. AND THEN throw in the fact that a lot of us with seasonal depression in the summer just really don’t thrive in the heat! It makes me anxious! I have allergies! Sunlight gives me a headache! Give me back sweater weather and leaves falling and shovelling snow over this madness!
My other friend Erica is also a sufferer of seasonal depression in the summer. “In my late teen years and, as of recently, in my early twenties whenever summer rolled around, I noticed I knew there was something off about my mental health during the summer months,” she told me. “I would make plans to go to the mall or run to my local grocery store by myself, and never follow through. It became worse when I would make plans with people and never follow through with details. Worst of all is that I felt comfort in the feeling of being held captive by my own home. In fact, it was actually more appealing to me than making plans with other people. I didn’t know this was called seasonal depression, that this could occur during the summer, that I had it, or that it was normal. I only discovered this information last year, and even at that never really spoke of it.” It’s difficult to speak of something not a lot of people realize exists. If you were to tell someone about your winter blues, they’d probably give you an empathetic head tilt and say, “Aw, yeah, me too! Can’t wait for summer!” But summer is not the saving grace for people like us. “I can remember one occasion, two years ago, when it first donned on me that there could be something wrong,” Erica said. “I had made lunch plans with a friend, as a farewell before he left to attend university in another province. As we were eating I said, for the first and only time out loud, ‘Do you know how hard it was for me to leave my house?’ The comment was likely brushed off during the moment, but it shouldn’t have been. This was the first time I admitted to myself that I struggled with great difficulty doing something completely mundane. And yet, I never really spoke about this to anyone, and I have yet to address this seriously. This is something I plan on changing.”
Leaving the house during the summer can be so stressful, and not just because I’m not a fan of the heat (although that really, really doesn’t help). It’s because time off, where my brain can go on eight rollercoaster rides at once to places unforeseen, where I can stress that I should be doing something productive right now because I haven’t “earned” the right to relax, is super overwhelming! Let’s just call it like it is! Summer sucks! Especially when it starts to transcend seemingly mundane tasks like leaving the house and starts ruining other things. If you have a hard time just existing in the summer and not keeping busy to the point of losing interest in things that once brought joy, clap your damn hands! Tell me who you are because I want you to know you’re not alone! It’s real and it’s relevant to being a young person in this day and age, even if there’s only one article about it on Psychology Today.
Despite all of that, I’ve gotten much better at talking myself down during the summer—something I still constantly have to work on during the school year. It’s crazy the places our minds can take us, but just remember that it’s never permanent and neither is summer! Winter turns to spring, spring to summer, summer to fall, and fall to winter. Wash, rinse, repeat. If there’s one thing we can always count on in this world, it’s the change of seasons. Another friend, Jessica, reminded me that people are like seasons too, and we should never forget that. “It’s important to nurture who you are,” she said. “You must begin to by tending to the roots if you ever want a flower. However, the flower will not always be in bloom. Just like the four seasons that come and go, we have seasons of life. Some seasons may be cold and lifeless but when the conditions are right, that flower will blossom. So learn the conditions that make YOU flourish and don’t get discouraged when the seasons change. This is the circle of life, and the sun will always rise.”
“I am awfully greedy; I want everything from life. I want to be a woman and to be a man, to have many friends and to have loneliness, to work much and write good books, to travel and enjoy myself, to be selfish and unselfish… You see, it is difficult to get all which I want. And then when I do not succeed I get mad with anger.”
—Simone de Beauvoir
“If you were happy every day of your life, you wouldn’t be a human being, you’d be a game show host.” —Veronica Sawyer, Heathers
—Benjamin Alire Sáenz
*Tina Fey in Mean Girls voice* How many of you have ever felt personally victimized by seasonal depression in the summer?
The general consensus and sweeping generalization is that the vast majority of people suffer from seasonal depression—also known by its official term, seasonal affective disorder (SAD)—in the winter months, when there is less sunlight and the days are shorter, and this typically causes people to fall into what we commonly call the “winter blues.” That is very much true for a lot of people. Winter blues is an actual psychological condition, and there has been a wide variety of research into the true affects and causes. But there is actually shockingly little information and research available on those who experience seasonal affective disorder in reverse—that is, they get the summer blues instead of the winter blues. Also, can we just quickly acknowledge the sheer irony in the fact that seasonal affective disorder abbreviates to SAD? Like, yes bitch, I’m SAD in the summer. It’s a thing.
According to Psychology Today, “For a small group of people, the dark days of winter don’t elicit depression, but renewed vigor and improved mood.” They say that experiencing seasonal affective disorder in reverse—since SAD is literally defined as experiencing the blues in the winter and no other seasons—affects about one-tenth of people who say they experience seasonal depression. “While winter SAD is linked to a lack of sunlight, it is thought that summer SAD is due to the reverse—possibly too much sunlight, which also lead to modulations in melatonin production. Another theory is that people might stay up later in the summer, throwing their sensitive circadian rhythms for a loop. Interestingly, summer SAD and winter SAD seem to be prevalent in areas that are particularly prone to warmer summers.” In other words, not everyone rejoices when the temperature goes up. It’s great that popular psychology has explored the winter blues at great length, but it seems very exclusionary to have very little discourse on experiencing seasonal depression in the summer. “Georgetown University psychiatrist and professor Norman Rosenthal, who first described and coined the term Seasonal Affective Disorder, notes that the drop in temperature can be calming for those people, who might otherwise find the summer heat oppressive and agitating.” I quite literally feel oppressed by the heat, just like how everyone in that gym felt personally victimized by Regina George. I’m sorry if I’m not all sunshine and roses in the summer like everyone else—I’m trying my very best, but Lana was right: “Summertime Sadness” is a bitch. Seasonal depression in the summer can be summarized by a single scene in the film Reality Bites:
(Minus the chain-smoking part, of course. This movie
is from 1994, when cigarettes were still cool.)
The very little research that has been done on SAD in the summer, however, says that it is more common among those who experience changes in mood when the temperature goes up. But there are very key differences between the winter blues and the summer blues, if we can even call it that. “Notable differences between summer and winter SAD are that summer SAD individuals may typically feel manic, whereas those with winter SAD lack energy.” I feel like everyone might lack a bit of energy in the winter, just because it is cold and gray and the days are short and I think that does start to get to everyone after awhile. But I’d much prefer the feeling I get in the winter, where I lack a bit of energy and use it as an excuse to be unproductive and watch The Mary Tyler Moore Show in bed all day. For someone like me, who has to remind themselves that it’s okay and necessary to take breaks and not constantly feel productive, days like those in the winter are often a welcome distraction. But when the summer rolls around, where the days are longer and there’s more sunlight (and heat), it’s almost like I feel contractually obliged by the season to be productive. I may have a to-do list of things that I would normally have no problem getting done over a series of days, but I find when I have both more time off and more hours in the day in the summer, it’s like I rush myself to get everything done as fast as humanly possible, just because I can. And I don’t even feel accomplished afterward! I feel drained, tired, sweaty, and hot, just like I did when I started the day. I do tend to feel manic in the summer, where I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with all this extra energy. And even when I try to force myself to rest, it doesn’t work. It’s chaotic and exhausting, and only gets worse as I get older.
I think it has something to do with the fact that I’m still getting accustomed to becoming an adult while still being a student. When I was in elementary school and high school, I used to heavily rely on my time off in the summer, because I knew I would be constantly working and going during the school year. Looking back, I realize now that a lot of that pressure I felt during the school year was created by me and my desire for perfection—if I could ruthlessly devote myself to my schoolwork during the school year, I would earn my time off in the summer. That’s how it’s always been for me. I have to earn my time off, or else I won’t be able to relax. But it doesn’t really work like that in the adult world, which is why I always have to remind myself that breaks are important and necessary, otherwise I’ll become a machine that doesn’t stop and won’t even realize that I’ve more than earned a break or two. Which is why, in the summer, I tend to feel all of these things intensely and all at once, because I’m not in school and don’t always have anything else to do that I feel passionately about every single day.
I tend to long for fulfillment in the summer, and I know I’m not alone on that. My friend Kayla (who is a graphic designer you can follow on Instagram @kaysthetics) told me she totally understands and resonates with the feelings experienced by those with seasonal depression in the summer. “The loneliness and existential dread that hits is absolutely rough and I long for fulfillment during the toughest of nights,” she said. “Routine is also a horrifying factor during the summer.” When you’re still trying to get used to this whole adulthood thing, it’s surprisingly hard to define yourself outside of what you knew to be true of yourself in the past. Not to say everything that was true about you when you were a child is gone, but it’s difficult to make that transition when you’ve always been someone who has kept your head down, gotten your work done, and been whoever anyone else wanted you to be. So when summer no longer merely means time off from school and any and all freedom that implies, it’s also difficult to feel happy and upbeat when you’re not doing something that you feel passionately about every day. AND THEN throw in the fact that a lot of us with seasonal depression in the summer just really don’t thrive in the heat! It makes me anxious! I have allergies! Sunlight gives me a headache! Give me back sweater weather and leaves falling and shovelling snow over this madness!
My other friend Erica is also a sufferer of seasonal depression in the summer. “In my late teen years and, as of recently, in my early twenties whenever summer rolled around, I noticed I knew there was something off about my mental health during the summer months,” she told me. “I would make plans to go to the mall or run to my local grocery store by myself, and never follow through. It became worse when I would make plans with people and never follow through with details. Worst of all is that I felt comfort in the feeling of being held captive by my own home. In fact, it was actually more appealing to me than making plans with other people. I didn’t know this was called seasonal depression, that this could occur during the summer, that I had it, or that it was normal. I only discovered this information last year, and even at that never really spoke of it.” It’s difficult to speak of something not a lot of people realize exists. If you were to tell someone about your winter blues, they’d probably give you an empathetic head tilt and say, “Aw, yeah, me too! Can’t wait for summer!” But summer is not the saving grace for people like us. “I can remember one occasion, two years ago, when it first donned on me that there could be something wrong,” Erica said. “I had made lunch plans with a friend, as a farewell before he left to attend university in another province. As we were eating I said, for the first and only time out loud, ‘Do you know how hard it was for me to leave my house?’ The comment was likely brushed off during the moment, but it shouldn’t have been. This was the first time I admitted to myself that I struggled with great difficulty doing something completely mundane. And yet, I never really spoke about this to anyone, and I have yet to address this seriously. This is something I plan on changing.”
Leaving the house during the summer can be so stressful, and not just because I’m not a fan of the heat (although that really, really doesn’t help). It’s because time off, where my brain can go on eight rollercoaster rides at once to places unforeseen, where I can stress that I should be doing something productive right now because I haven’t “earned” the right to relax, is super overwhelming! Let’s just call it like it is! Summer sucks! Especially when it starts to transcend seemingly mundane tasks like leaving the house and starts ruining other things. If you have a hard time just existing in the summer and not keeping busy to the point of losing interest in things that once brought joy, clap your damn hands! Tell me who you are because I want you to know you’re not alone! It’s real and it’s relevant to being a young person in this day and age, even if there’s only one article about it on Psychology Today.
Despite all of that, I’ve gotten much better at talking myself down during the summer—something I still constantly have to work on during the school year. It’s crazy the places our minds can take us, but just remember that it’s never permanent and neither is summer! Winter turns to spring, spring to summer, summer to fall, and fall to winter. Wash, rinse, repeat. If there’s one thing we can always count on in this world, it’s the change of seasons. Another friend, Jessica, reminded me that people are like seasons too, and we should never forget that. “It’s important to nurture who you are,” she said. “You must begin to by tending to the roots if you ever want a flower. However, the flower will not always be in bloom. Just like the four seasons that come and go, we have seasons of life. Some seasons may be cold and lifeless but when the conditions are right, that flower will blossom. So learn the conditions that make YOU flourish and don’t get discouraged when the seasons change. This is the circle of life, and the sun will always rise.”
“I am awfully greedy; I want everything from life. I want to be a woman and to be a man, to have many friends and to have loneliness, to work much and write good books, to travel and enjoy myself, to be selfish and unselfish… You see, it is difficult to get all which I want. And then when I do not succeed I get mad with anger.”
—Simone de Beauvoir
“If you were happy every day of your life, you wouldn’t be a human being, you’d be a game show host.” —Veronica Sawyer, Heathers
(Recommended listening for this essay: “Summertime Sadness” by Lana Del Rey, “Change of Seasons” by Sweet Thing, “God is a DJ” by P!nk, “Machine Heart” by Kelsea Ballerini, and “Can’t Stop Now” by Allie X)
Follow It's Not That Deep on Instagram — @areyouthereanxiety — and listen to my playlist of mental health songs on Spotify and Apple Music
yay! insightful, real, raw, and "me af" . @areyouthereanxiety be serving realness
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